So I am sitting here alone in the girlfriend's house ... and the tv is on to have some noise.  because as soon as she went out the door for her run, the tears came.   I don't really care much  I cried for a minute or two & then I made a coffee & booted up the laptop.  Distraction helps.

Why do you cry? Who knows ...  today I couldn't even see what feelings were behind the tears.   So I just let it go.  What ever it is it isn't important. 

So in a moment, I will click save & go shower & shave.   Those are two of the first items on the list I made all those years ago.  I made a list of instructions to live by that helped me survive depression when I first gave up drinking & drugs.  Those instructions come back to mind on the days when life gets weird & the shadows threaten to engulf my soul.   

Just for today I will have faith ... in the process & in my own ability to survive.